Lostin Flowers

How did Santa feel when he got stuck in the chimney?

Claus-trophobic.

Wanna hear a couple of short jokes and a long joke?

Joke,

Joke,

Jooooooooooooooke.

The only thing flat earthers have to fear...

... is a sphere itself.

Two guys were beating up someone in an alley, so I stepped in to help.

He didn't stand a chance against the three of us.

Never challenge death to a pillow fight.

Unless you're prepared for the reapercushions.

My three favorite things are eating my family, and not using commas.

What does a cigar and a hamster have in common?

Both are completely harmless until you put it in your mouth and light it on fire.

A friend took me out to his shed and was showing me all his tools, when he pointed to a ladder. "That's my step ladder," he said. "I never knew my real ladder."

What goes cackle, cackle, *bonk*?

A witch laughing its head off.