Wade

What did the helicopter say to the mountain? “Kobe!”

Hellen Keller walked into a bar, then a chair, then a table.

Why does Ezra Miller’s Flash run in a straight line in The Flash movie? Bro ain’t straight.

What is the worst thing about your birthday being on September 11?

Party crashers.

Do you know the best thing about killing a hooker?

Not only do you get your money back, but the second hour is free.

Knock, knock.

Who's there?

Your dad.

But my dad's dead.

I know, just reminding you!

Yo mama so fat, the cops arrested her because she had 240 pounds of crack on her.

A man finds out his wife is cheating on him with his best friend, so he hires a hitman to shoot his wife in the head, and his friend in the balls. The hitman charges $100 per bullet. The man agrees.

Later, they set up, and the hitman looks through the scope and says, “I can save you $100!”